Every year I clamber into bed in a food-induced stupour, wearing my 'comfiest' pyjamas (code for massive waistband), genuinely surprised by how sick I feel. Despite the fact that my stomach has been in 'Christmas Mode' since mid-November - "Full? Moi?" - I once again struggled slightly to pull off the ultimate nomming achievement of the year.
Seriously, there's a reason why you won't find many all-you-can-eat restaurants open on this day. At no other point of the year would I consider my daily intake - three solid meals ("solid" = "excessive") and around thirty-three mini-meals, combining sweet and savoury like a crazed pregnant woman who's just been told that all food in the world is about to run out - with a sick kind of fondness only ever repeated on Easter Sunday.
It got to a point in the evening where I actually peered down over my food-baby at the white chocolate mountain on the carpet and thought, "Naaah..." Because that's the down side to playing 'Ultimate Eating Champion' (Christmas? What Christmas?). We're all just setting ourselves up for failure. And I'm not talking the usual Sunday roast, 'hands up, I give up' kind of failure. This is more like leaving your loved ones out on the Front Line, many men fallen before you, scared for their lives but proud of the sheer determination and stupidity that gives them the strength to accomplish that final, near-impossible goal......... The Quality Streets.
Merry Christmas everyone!
Seriously, there's a reason why you won't find many all-you-can-eat restaurants open on this day. At no other point of the year would I consider my daily intake - three solid meals ("solid" = "excessive") and around thirty-three mini-meals, combining sweet and savoury like a crazed pregnant woman who's just been told that all food in the world is about to run out - with a sick kind of fondness only ever repeated on Easter Sunday.
It got to a point in the evening where I actually peered down over my food-baby at the white chocolate mountain on the carpet and thought, "Naaah..." Because that's the down side to playing 'Ultimate Eating Champion' (Christmas? What Christmas?). We're all just setting ourselves up for failure. And I'm not talking the usual Sunday roast, 'hands up, I give up' kind of failure. This is more like leaving your loved ones out on the Front Line, many men fallen before you, scared for their lives but proud of the sheer determination and stupidity that gives them the strength to accomplish that final, near-impossible goal......... The Quality Streets.
Merry Christmas everyone!
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